Hey y'all, if you dougs haven't had the time to watch the Manti Te'o interview with Katie Couric because you're busy or maybe because you just don't give a fuck about the whens and whys but, like myself, were just entertained by the sheer wtf-ness of the whole ordeal, then you are in luck. In fact, the only reason I watched was because I felt a sense of duty and obligation to you all as a founding father of this blog, which you guys have kept going through your faithful following and generous donations and for which Heat and I both thank you from the bases of our girthy cocks.
So let's get on to the meat (hahaahahahaahahaha no pun intended) of this interview:
Well I'd better keep these legs crossed!
Do you? Do you recognize how not gay I am? How much I live and die for the vagine? I would bleed for the vagina. I wouldn't bleed for the dick. I fucking hate the dick, Katie. I hate it. I hate how veiny it is and how it shoots hot white cum at you when you play with it. I hate that shit. Hate the clean up. But the vagina is majestic and I'm in fucking love with it.
You want me to prove it to you? You want this runner-up dick?
Take your old cell phones...and in seconds, ATTACH THEM TO YOUR FACE!